Season 11 TO Without A Ring
by unagi23
Summary: Thanksgiving Episode. Ross and Rachel decide to host Thanksgiving, but can they handle the responsibility? *Edit-I left a part out. There are actually 4 chapters, but I've fixed it now.*
1. Chapter 1

**Season 11**

**Episode 6: TO Without A Ring**

**(Scene: Central Perk. Everyone is there.)**

Phoebe: So what are we doing for Thanksgiving this year?

Monica: What do you mean?

Phoebe: Well after what happened last year I figured you wouldn't want to host it again.

Rachel: Ross and I will do it.

Monica: What?

everyone except Monica: Yeah okay.

Monica: But..

Chandler: We'd be delighted.

Ross: Okay, well I guess we'll have dinner at 4ish?

Joey: Four? That's way too late!

Phoebe: Joey, we always eat at four.

Rachel: And Mon, don't worry about a thing. We'll take care of it all. You can just sit back and relax.

Monica: If only it were that easy.

**(Scene: Thanksgiving day at Ross and Rachel's apartment. They are getting everything ready in the kitchen.)**

Rachel: (to Ross) Well so far the apartment isn't on fire, so I think I'm doing good.

(door bell)

Rachel: Ross, can you get that?

Ross: Sure. (walks into living room and opens door) Hey Phoebe! Come on in.

Phoebe: I brought a pie.

Ross: Great, we could really use more dessert.

Phoebe: Did Rachel ruin it?

Ross: Surprisingly no. (takes pie) But it's better to play it safe.

(Phoebe and Ross go into the kitchen)

Rachel: Hey Pheebs! Happy thanksgiving!

Phoebe: Oh you too! Wow everything smells great!

Rachel: Well thanks! Where's Mike?

Phoebe: He's going to be late. He had a family emergency.

Ross: What happened?

Phoebe: His parents couldn't find their plane tickets.

(door bell)

Phoebe: I'll get it. You guys just keep cooking. (looks at Ross) Well _Rachel's_ cooking.

(she leaves)

Rachel: What _have_ you done today?

(cut to front door)

(Phoebe opens door and lets Joey in)

Phoebe: Happy thanksgiving!

Joey: Happy thanksgiving! I brought a pie.

Phoebe: Me too! (sees his empty hand) Wait, what pie ?

Joey: This pie. (looks down) Oh crap! I should have never taken the long way here.

Phoebe: You live across the street!

**(Scene: Short time lapse. Monica and Chandler are in Ross and Rachel's apartment while everyone is keeping busy. Chandler is giving Monica a pep talk, and he sounds like he's talking to a little kid)**

Chandler: Now Monica, I know you usually put together everything for the holidays. _But_ this is Ross and Rachel's chance to take charge. So try your best to refrain from being well...you.

Monica: All right. I'll keep my mouth shut. But just so you know, it won't be easy!

Chandler: Good.

Monica: (looks around) Where are we supposed to eat?

Chandler: (to self) I tried.

Rachel: (comes out from kitchen) What do you mean? (looks around also) Oh crap! Rossss. We never got a table!

Ross: Oh no! You're right. Well what should we do?

Rachel: I guess go find a table. (goes back in kitchen)

Ross: By myself?

Monica: Chandler!

(he enters)

Monica: Go help Ross. He needs to find a table for dinner.

Chandler: Sure. Why not? It's not like I was doing anything important.

Monica: Just please do it.

Chandler: Fine, but those potatoes won't peel themselves!

Monica: That's why Rachel bought instant, honey.

Ross: Come on man, I think I know where we can get one.

Phoebe: Okay, but hurry back!

(Ross and Chandler grab their coats and leave)

Rachel: (reenters) Are they gone?

Monica: Yeah why?

Rachel: I'm...uh...missing something.

Phoebe: What?

Rachel: (takes a deep breath) My engagement ring.

Monica: See! This is why _I_ usually cook!


	2. Chapter 2

**(Scene: Chandler and Ross are in a hallway of the building, deciding where they can find a table.)**

Ross: I should have known that most stores in New York aren't open on a holiday.

Chandler: Why don't we just ask people here?

Ross: All right. Surely someone will have an extra table we can borrow. Who should we try first?

Chandler: How about Apartment 3 there? (knocks)

Ross: This reminds me of the good old days in college when we used to go room to room looking for single chicks.

Chandler: And oddly enough every girl was always taken.

(door opens to a highly attractive female)

Chandler: Things _do_ get better out of college.

Woman: Can I help you?

Ross: Yes, we were wondering if you maybe had an extra table lying around somewhere?

Woman: I'm sorry no.

Ross: Okay, well thanks anyway.

(she shuts door)

Chandler: Well that was worth it.

**(Scene: R&R's apartment. Joey is watching tv while Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are in the kitchen)**

Phoebe: What are you going to do?

Rachel: I don't know! I don't know! I can't tell Ross, but I also don't want him finding it in the mashed potatoes.

Monica: How could you not have taken off your ring?!

Phoebe: Well techniquely she did, it's just going to end up in someone's side dish.

Monica: Well we're going to have to start over.

Rachel: What?!

Phoebe: Or we could just have Joey look for it!

Rachel: Yes! Good idea! Joeeyyy (exits into living room)

(Monica starts to get out fresh ingredients)

Phoebe: What are you doing? We don't have to redo everything now.

Monica: I know.

Phoebe: Okay. (exits kitchen)

(scene changes to living room)

Joey: So you want me to eat all the food _before_ dinner?

Rachel: Well not all of the food, just..em..enough to get a taste of it. Think of yourself as an official taste tester.

Joey: Ooh. I like the sound of that. Bring it on.

Phoebe: I'll go get one of the dishes.

(enters kitchen)

Phoebe: Monica! You're making a new batch of stuffing!

Monica: Nuh-uh.

Phoebe: Yes you are!

Monica: I'm making _another _batch of stuffing.


	3. Chapter 3

**(Scene: Chandler and Ross are in a different hallway of the building)**

Ross: I find it hard to believe that no one in this whole building has an extra table.

Chandler: You didn't.

Ross: (glares) We're running out of time. Dinner's going to be done soon.

Chandler: Have we tried this apartment yet?

Ross: I don't think so. (knocks)

(a little old lady opens the door)

Lady: Well hello there. Happy Thanksgiving! I've been waiting for you two.

Chandler: Huh?

Lady: Come in, come in.

(Ross starts to go in)

Chandler: What are you doing?

Ross: She might have a table.

Chandler: Or a disease!

Ross: Come on, we'll just stay a little while.

Lady: (calling from inside apartment) Matthew! David!

Chandler: (sighs) I'll be Matthew.

Ross: That's the spirit.

(they walk in to a room with about 20 cats)

Chandler: Of course, what old lady doesn't have a house full of cats?

**(Scene: R&R's apartment. Joey is sitting on the couch, surrounded by several side dishes)**

Joey: Yams..(takes a bite) Good. Wait! (takes another bite) Goooood.

Rachel: Good? Okay. (Joey keeps eating) Okay. (she grabs bowl) Well don't eat it all.

Phoebe: I think we're out of dishes here.

Rachel: And still no ring.

Joey: What?

Phoebe: (loudly) We're going to get you more food.

Joey: Okay.

(Rachel and Phoebe start to leave)

Joey: I still get dinner right? Because I don't want to do this if I don't get dinner.

Rachel: Yes Joey.

Joey: You better not be lying to me woman.

(Rachel and Phoebe go into kitchen)

(Monica has prepared all new food)

Rachel: What's with all of the food?

Monica: I..uh..I wanted to help you out.

Rachel: That's so sweet!

Monica: This way we can look through all of the food for your ring, and no one will ever know.

Rachel: I can't thank you enough for doing this. I'll be right back, I'm going to go check on Emma and the twins.

(leaves)

Phoebe: Do you want some help?

Monica: No! I mean, uh..no thanks.

(Joey enters)

Joey: Where's this food I was promised?

Phoebe: We're bringing it to you in a minute. But if I were you, I'd grab some Tums.

Joey: Tums? I'm not going to waste my energy on candy. (laughs then leaves)

Monica: Somebody's going to be in pain today.


	4. Chapter 4

**(Scene: The old lady's apartment. Chandler is absolutely bored, and Ross seems to be enjoying himself)**

Ross: Yes! I remember that Thanksgiving!

Old Woman: You made the best deviled eggs this family has ever seen.

Ross: Oh come on, stop it.

Old Woman: I should give you my recipe for them, so you can try it out next year. Let me go get it out of the kitchen.

(leaves)

Ross: Isn't she sweet?

Chandler: I'm sorry did you say something? It's hard to hear you when 18 cats are in heat.

(she returns with two cookies and the recipe)

Old Woman: I thought you boys might like a treat. (hands one to each of them)

(Ross starts eating it and Chandler opens his mouth to take a bite.)

Old Woman: If you see any hairs on there just pull them out. Sometimes Fluffy gets curious.

(Chandler automatically drops the cookie.)

Chandler: Well I think we ought to get going.

Ross: Yeah Matthew's probably right. Thank you again for the cookies.

Old Woman: It was nothing hun. (Chandler and Ross start heading for the door) Now you two take care of yourselves.

(They are out in the hallway when Ross gives her a hug. She tries to hug Chandler but he refuses)

Woman: And David, make sure to send me Christmas pictures.

Ross: I will.

(she says goodbye and shuts door)

(there's a moment of silence)

Ross: Oh no! We never got a table!

Chandler: I think I'd rather eat on the floor.

**(Scene: Joey is sitting on the couch still, eating mashed potatoes. Rachel and Phoebe are sitting next to him.)**

Phoebe: (talking to Rachel) You don't have any idea where it might be?

Rachel: (sighs) No.

Phoebe: You could always tell Ross that Joey ate it.

Rachel: (looks at Joey) That, he might actually believe.

(Chandler and Ross enter from hallway.)

Phoebe: You were gone for almost 2 hours! Where have you guys been?!

Chandler: A giant litter box.

Rachel: Okay? Did you ever find a table?

Chandler: No.

Ross: What should we do?

Rachel: Oh we're just going to eat on the coffee table.

Chandler: The coffee table that's been here the whole time?

Rachel: Yeah.

Chandler: Excuse me, while I wallow in self-pity.

Joey: (finishes the bowl) Now _that_ was a workout. I don't think I have room for anything else.

Monica: (calling from kitchen) Okay, Dinner's ready!

Joey: Let's do this!

Monica: (enters with a bowl of yams and sees the empty containers on the table) Where's all of the food? I put out the whole meal.

Joey: That wasn't part of the taste test?

Monica: NO! Joey! I can't believe you ate everything!

Ross: You ate everything?!

Monica: Why didn't you guys stop him?!

Rachel: We thought you had everything in the kitchen.

Chandler: Ross and I spent two hours with Old Lady Farts-A-Lot and this is how we're thanked?!

Phoebe: I'm sorry, but only people who bring back tables get to talk.

Ross: Well at least we have the turkey.

Rachel: (Gasps) The turkey!

Joey: No turkey!??

Chandler: How could you forget a turkey?

Monica: That's it. I am _so_ hosting Thanksgiving next year.

Phoebe: Man, this day just keeps getting worse and worse. First Rachel loses her ring..

Ross: (to Rachel) You lost your ring??!!

Rachel: Techniqually I misplaced it, but yes.

Joey: What, this ring? (pulls out a ring from his pocket.)

Rachel: Yes! Joey, thank you! Where did you find it?

Joey: It was on the counter next to the sink. I saw you take it off and put it there.

(everyone glares at Rachel)

Monica: Why didn't you say anything?

Joey: I got distracted. And when I remembered again you had brought me food..

Rachel: Why did you think we wanted you to eat it?!

Joey: You told me I was an official taste tester!

Ross: How could you eat _two_ meals, and still be hungry for a third?

Joey: Ross, please.

Rachel: So what are we going to do?

**(Scene. Time lapse. The gang is sitting around the coffee table eating Chinese food.)**

Ross: Nothing says Thanksgiving like lomein and fried rice.

Chandler: Yes, the traditional feast of the Pilgrims and Indians.

Rachel: Guys, I'm so sorry this didn't work out as planned.

Monica: And I'm sorry that I tried to fix the food you cooked.

(Rachel looks at her)

Monica: Egg roll anyone?

(Mike enters)

Everyone: Mike!

Mike: Happy Thanksgiving! Sorry I'm late. I brought some extra bread rolls..but I see you've taken the oriental route.

Ross: Take a seat.

Mike: (sits) When Phoebe told me that you were having Thanksgiving here I was honestly surprised. I figured with it being the twins' first, you'd have it your house Monica.

(Monica glares at Rachel)

Rachel: Fortune cookie?

Monica: (opening cookie and reading it) "Bad luck will come to those who deserve it."

Chandler: What do you know? You've finally experienced a true Bing Thanksgiving.


End file.
